Merging The Sexual And The Spiritual With Kenneth Ray Stubbs

Nov 23, 2022

What do you get when you combine sex, spirituality, erotic massage, and a 1970s porn theatre? You get one really interesting conversation.

Kenneth Ray Stubbs is a Sexual Shaman who has a really amazing life story, from working at a porn theatre during his hippie travelling days, to studying massage, joining the Faculty at the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, and publishing numerous books on sexuality and related subjects. Kenneth was there in the early days of the emerging field of sexuality and has a fascinating perspective on the topics of sex, sexuality, genders, and relationships that you won’t want to miss.

In this episode we talk about so much, including what it means to approach sexuality in a spiritual way, where the idea for the concept of the sexual shaman came from, how couples can reconnect sexually, and why Kenneth believes that porn is just plain boring. We also discuss the importance of being present with your partner and how we have culturally constructed the ideas we have around sexuality and spirituality and masculine and feminine - this is a truly riveting conversation, so grab your favourite drink, get comfortable, and enjoy!



Kenneth’s story, from hippie to porn theatre to the Faculty at the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. [1:55]

What it means to be a Sexual Shaman. [11:40]

Kenneth’s experience meeting people as a Sexual Shaman. [23:55]

How he defines masculinity. [27:50]

How couples can connect more sexually and spiritually. [38:20]

Kenneth’s best tip for the bedroom. [49:50]

The beliefs he had to cultivate to be able to publish his books with such success. [57:20]



  • Connect more with your partner.

  • Genders are just constructs.

  • Don’t be afraid to lose yourself.

  • Touch is important.



“Embrace what we may have felt limited about in the past and see how it fits for us at this point in our life.” - Kenneth Ray Stubbs

“It was all about developing abilities to dance with the energy within.” - Kenneth Ray Stubbs

“To get back to the garden is to be at the place where our sexual nature and our spiritual nature are.” - Kenneth Ray Stubbs

“It doesn’t mean that what they’re doing is bad or wrong, it’s just society makes it a rather shameful negative activity.” - Kenneth Ray Stubbs

“What excites me today is developing myself more energetically, regardless of whether it’s around sexuality or spirituality.” - Kenneth Ray Stubbs



[10:20 - 11:20] The importance of accepting the differences in people.

[16:10 - 17:15] The old way of washing away the horrors of war.

[27:55 - 28:45] Why Kenneth does not find the terms masculine and feminine useful.



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